Republicans decide to forego being Republicans to continue hating gays

So the Republican controlled House decided to defend DOMA themselves because Obama decided (correctly) not to do so himself. You can see the Washington Post article here. I'm honestly a bit confused as to how they can continue calling themselves conservatives, when they not.

That's not entirely true, I'll give them some credit. They're conservatives when it's convenient for them. I'm sure they're all very conservative around election time, when they need to rouse their ultra-conservative fan base by deception. We saw that with McCain's apeshit-crazy phase, that suspiciously only lasted during election season.

But now, they've decided to abandon their conservative principles. I guess it's pretty easy to abandon the core values of one's political party when you're as personally disgusted and afraid of gay people as most Republicans are.

I could be confused, but isn't the Republican party in favor of smaller government and decreased spending? Not to mention lowering taxes (but only for the rich) and increasing state's rights. We've heard arguments again and a again (every time marriage equality comes up really) that states should be able to decide for themselves whether they want to give gays the rights that straights enjoy. Nevermind that the rights of the few should never be put to the vote of the many. Yet here they are, forcing DOMA on all of the states! Why the hypocrisy?

Well because everyone should hate the gays of course! Or at least Boehner (ha, boner) thinks so. Which brings us to several Republicans fighting to keep a larger government. And using taxpayer dollars to do it. Hmm, I've heard on the internet that that's called "doin it rong." You're foolishly throwing away taxpayer dollars on frivolities, something you regularly accuse the Democrats of doing.

I'm sorry to say that I'm not surprised at this turn of events. It's quite easy to argue for a smaller government as long as you're not planning to get rid of any part of government that you like. Yes, "let's get rid of healthcare for everyone but damnit we need to spend millions on making sure gays can't get married!" makes tons of sense. I think that made sense to some stoner in California.

It's one thing to demand the government spend less. I'm completely in favor of decreased government spending. Hell, I wouldn't mind lower taxes either. Unfortunately, the Republicans disagree with me. And they're willing to ignore their beliefs when it's comes to keeping rights away from us. Like in Wisconsin.

Have a good weekend everyone!
-Kevin

Tough and Love for Mr. Sheen

Dear B&B,

What do you think of this whole Charlie Sheen situation?

Love,

Pop Culture Whore

This brings us to our new segment, Tough and Love.

Billy: Ok this message is for Charlie Sheen who should listen to me because we know I am always right. Charlie, you are a HOT MESS. No one can deny it. Even Courtney Love is looking at you and says you need to slow the fuck down. You do so much smack-talking you make Perez look like the puppy dog in the window with the waggy tail. Mel Gibson is wondering how you keep at it. You are so crazy that you make Tom Cruise look normal even when he’s jumping on the couch and zooming around the audience like he is a 5 year old pretending to be an airplane. Even Lindsay Lohan looks at you with disgust!

Blake: So let’s sit down and analyze what the problem is. You seem to have a little issue with drugs that needs to be addressed.

Billy: You do so much blow you need to order more strippers so you have enough surface area off of which to snort. Stop the snorting and start taking care of yourself! You look like you just escaped Nazi Germany.

Blake: And you seem to have a bit of an issue with authority figures like bosses and producers and your own father.

Billy: Boy if you were my kid I would slap you harder than a pimp smackin his hoes. Right now, despite the money you WERE bringing in, is sooo not worth it. You are such a selfish brat I would have to bitch slap you back to last Tuesday to teach you some manners.

Blake: We think you are a funny guy and hopefully it isn’t the drugs that were talking. But we think you need to go away... take a break.. and get better so you can stop upstaging the other Hollywood crazies.

Billy: WERE talking!? What’s this “were talking” crap? You need to stop talking first! Yeah go get some help in a REAL rehab place, not one of those namby pamby places you have in your house. One where you wake up and you can remind yourself how messed up your life is. And leave Dr. Drew out of it. He’s a loser. Shut the fuck up or lady gaga will come and make a dress out of you next!

Blake: Summary: Get yourself some help and get better out of the spotlight, betch.

XXOO

Billy & Blake