In relationships we all have baggage, whether you have been married for 20 years and you keep your first boyfriend’s letters to you or his class ring, or if it is something like smelling an A&F store and being reminded of Charlie the high school crush/best friend who you wish and hoped for but never got.
As we are in the digital age our baggage goes digital as well. Mix-tapes and CDs have been replaced by iPod playlists. Facebook relationships declare people being “official” and often come long before we get the bridal registry. Tweets about the sweet romantic gesture Joe made or a YouTube rant of someone crying under a bed sheet telling Josh what a MAJOR DBAG HE IS FOR BREAKING UP VIA A FACEBOOK MESSAGE! I mean seriously what is a boy to do? Our lives get filled up with all this excess data.
I’m no different. I’m an MP3 Junkie. I love music. I steal it from people and it reminds me of them later. Does this mean I am in love with all these people? No. I mean I have songs that remind me of my mother…and that’s just gross.
However, there are some songs that remind me of crushes and exes. Entry one from this series and the first boy to the chopping block is Josh. Yes, in fact, he is the dbag I was talking about earlier. While I didn’t make a YouTube video about his internet breakup, it still hurt like hell. Yet despite that series of unfortunate events, I have Selena Gomez’s Naturally still on my iPod, a song that he liked a lot and exposed me to.
As I listen to this song on my commute and think about Josh and our relationship I am struck one thing about this song: how ironic it is because I believe my relationship with Josh was the most unnatural thing there was. This song talks about people being natural when expressing themselves in a relationship. He wasn’t himself.
We met on an online dating site and I scored some tickets to see Cats in Chicago. Gentlemen take it from me, taking your date to see a whole bunch of people dance around in tights is not the best first date. But he kept going for it. We kept dating even though I noticed that he was visibly uncomfortable being out in public as boyfriends. This boy was definitely in the closet… not Narnia deep, but was definitely finding many Xmas gifts.
Our relationship didn’t work and it is quite obvious to me why it didn’t. I think Josh realized that he wasn’t expressing himself and that the relationship wasn’t natural. So he decided to break it off.
But I guess this song just reminds me ultimately that relationships 1) need to come naturally and 2) that I am still waiting for the thunder.
Sweet Dreams Boys
~Cary Thomas~
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